Dear Garfield,

I'm really excited about seeing your new movie. Do you remember that time when you and Jon wrote that book, "Garfield Tips the Scales?" That was probably my favorite.

Did you like working with Jennifer Love Hewitt? I heard she was nice to work with in "I Still Know What You Did Last Summer." My Mom said she's a no-talent, overpaid whore, but I don't believe her. My Mom gets angry when she drinks.

Is it weird that my sister thought you were kinda hot when she was a kid? Her name is Cat, too.

Remember that time you ate all that lasagne and made Jon mad? I hope you do it in the movie. That would be good.

Do you ever get tired of picking on Odie? I mean, it's still really funny, but I just guess it would make him sad. If Odie was my pet, I wouldn't pick on him or accidentally kill him like I did my hamster. I learned a big lesson that day.

Anyways, Garfield. Good job on the movie. Even though my teacher said it's just another way to bilk tweens out of millions through shoddily-made licensed products from Hong Kong, I'm going to see it. My teacher got mad at Scooby-Doo, too. But my Dad says she's just an unmarried bitty. Whatever that means. She has a lot of cats, though. So I thought she'd like your movie. I guess not.

Goodnight, Garfield.
JB